Thursday, August 20, 2009

Rages of the day, in list form.

UGH, exemplified by:

1. MTV saying that "Inglourious Basterds" could finally make Quentin Tarantino a "true breakout star" and lift "the director from treasured auteur to the truly highest echelon of Hollywood directors." I'm sorry, MTV, are you on crack? Tarantino is on that truly highest level; have you forgotten how phenomenally successful "Kill Bill" was?

No, Tarantino isn't as mainstream as someone like Steven Spielberg, but saying that he's not on the "highest echelon" is just fucking ignorant.

2. Some kid lit another kid on fire while they were playing with lighter fluid ... twice. Seriously? Wasn't "Firestarter" popular, like, a decade ago?

3. Oprah admits to buying 20 pies from some Massachusetts company. OK, this doesn't really make me angry. It just makes me jealous, because pie is delicious.


4. The Black Eyed Peas make history by topping the Billboard charts for 20 straight weeks, with singles "Boom Boom Pow" and "I Gotta Feeling." This further proves that America sucks. I'm not going to try to argue that their songs aren't catchy, because look, even I'll get down to "My Humps" in my bedroom when no one is watching. But the fact that the group is now distinguished forever with this accolade is just upsetting. There was no one else that could have done this? Shit, even is shocked: "If these people like the Beatles, the Rolling Stones and Michael Jackson have these No. 1s, but yet we just broke a record, how am I supposed to take that?" Agreed.

5. The Smashing Pumpkins now have a new drummer. Great! So Billy Corgan can continue torturing anyone who loved "Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness" by putting out unnecessary music that proves his own douchiness. I'm excited!

6. Spike Lee is holding a block party in New York on what would have been Michael Jackson's 51st birthday. I guess it's a nice sentiment ... but I kinda feel like Dave Chappelle already did that. You know, for his own birthday.

7. Record labels suck a dick. That is all.

+ Photo courtesy of Hecklerspray and Socypath

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