When shoes attack!

OK, I think I'm finally starting, just a little bit, to get over my Nike obsession. Why, you may ask? Because I find these neon hi-tops utterly ghastly, an opinion I DEFINITELY WOULD NOT HAVE HELD a couple of years ago:

Nike Vandal, $78

Instead, I would really like some shoe fairy godmother just to show up at my doorstep with these:

Jessica Simpson Sabina Sandal, $109.95

All I'm trying to do is look like a streetwalker! Enable me!

Oh, and speaking of streetwalkers: If there was anyone more fitting than Mischa Barton to play a hooker on "Law and Order: SVU," I can't think of them.


Is this really how she expects to pay off her $7,000-a-month apartment in Tribeca? Good luck, trick.

+ Photos courtesy of Nordstrom, OMG! Yahoo