If Kate Winslet and Emma Watson do a cosmetics ad together I will annihilate something.

I refuse to call Wednesday "Hump Day," because I think a. humping is gross b. yeah. c. if you're humping, why wouldn't you just have sex already? d. I don't get it.

And yet, HERE WE ARE. Tomorrow I leave town to attend my brother's medical school graduation ceremony, so if you don't see any posts by me until Saturday, contain your tears. I know it's tough. It will tear you apart, probably. BUT POWER THROUGH. I'll be back this weekend.

Until then, have this.

1. Pink - whose awful hair I commented on in a recent post - admits her new hair sucks, and goes the easy route: blaming it on the hairstylist. As one of my friends pointed out, she looks like Mrs. Roper with the new hair and the caftan. I should have loved that, since Mrs. Roper had amazing outfits like this ...


... and this ...


... but on Pink, the caftan + shitty hair = not as good. Maybe she'll let her hair grow out and will hopefully go to another hairdresser next time. May I suggest someone who doesn't suck?

2. Did anyone else know that Carson Daly's show was still on the air? Prepare to have your mind blown even more: NBC just picked it up for an 11th season. ELEVEN. YEARS. It's amazing to realize that Daly has managed to stay relevant that long, and it's horrible that the only thing I can really tell you about all his time in the spotlight is that he's lost some weight since his "TRL" days. See?


Anyway, I miss nothing about "TRL" but the Backstreet Boys. I didn't have cable when "TRL" was on the air so I used to make my friends record episodes for me - ON VHS! - so I could watch them later. I still think I have this music video on tape somewhere.



3. I've always been jealous of Emma Watson - those legs! that daring pixie haircut! - and now I'm EVEN MORE JEALOUS that she LEFT her education at Brown University to go be the new face of Lancôme. Here's a picture of her shooting an ad in Paris earlier this week:


You know what makes me most angry, though? KATE WINSLET, FEMALE ICON OF MY LIFE, ALSO WORKS FOR LANCOME.


Meaning that Emma Watson and Kate Winslet will probably get to hang out and be friends and do British things together. I AM SO JEALOUS I CAN ONLY WRITE IN CAPS TO CONVEY MY FEELINGS OF ENVY AND RAGE.

+ Photos courtesy of 3.bp.blogspot.com, 4.bp.blogspot.com, www.starling-fitness.com, justjared.buzznet.com, models.com